You Might Be A Crossder If...



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Over the past few years I have often been asked if I was Transsexual or a Crossdresser.  Well, not that it really makes a difference what I am, I have always thought of myself as being a Crossdresser simply because I liked wear female clothing; and while there have been times when I have considered hormones, facial feminization and breast implants just to enhance my appearance the bottom line is that I just like wearing the clothes, so I guess that makes me just your common garden variety Crossdresser that also has an addiction for shoes.  So, borrowing the premise I first heard from comedian Jeff Foxworthy, "You Might Be A Redneck" I have come up with the following unofficial test which may help answer the question as to why you find so much enjoyment from wearing feminine clothing.


You Might Be A Crossdresser If...

1.  You have more lingerie than your wife or SO.

2.  You have more female clothes than male clothes in your closet.

3.  You have your own "Angel Card" from Victoria's Secret.

4.  You know the location of every women's consignment store in town.

5.  You receive your own copy of the Victoria's Secret catalogue.

6.  You have your own "Passport Card" from Chico's.

7.  You feel more comfortable wearing heels rather than men's shoes.

8.  You have a discount card from DSW.

9. There are 16 wigs in various styles in the closet, and they all belong to you.

10. You know the names of 10 shades of OPI nail polish, and have tried them all.

11.  The nail technicians at the nail salon know you on a first name basis.

12.  The color of your wallet and shoes always match.

13.  You are overly concerned about not getting a "Farmers Tan."

14. Your wife complains about you using her razor.

15. You tend to carry your "Fannie Pack" on your shoulder.

16. The only magazines in your home are for Vogue, Glamour, and Cosmopolitan.

17. Your wife asked you which dress you would wear for that special night out.

18. You ask your wife if the pants you are wearing makes your butt look big.

19.  You have "Zappo Shoes" book marked as one of your favorite places.

20.  The sales people at Victoria's Secret stop asking you if this is a gift.

21.  The sales lady at Chico's tells you she has your size in the back.

22.  The manager at the MAC store offers you an associate position.

23.  You wear pantyhose under your male clothes just in case there's a shoe sale at Macy's.

24.  You have your electrolysis phone number on speed dial.

25.  You always schedule a business trip to Atlanta just around the time of Southern Comfort.

26.  You deliberately loose bets to your wife which require you to dress as a maid for the day.

27.  You avoid attending your parents 50th anniversary as it comes at the same time as Fantasia Fair.

28.  You decline to attend the Pre Super Bowl party as it coincides with your Tri Ess meeting.

29.  You enjoy wearing pantyhose during June, July, August, and September (Florida residents only).

30.  You deliberately have the air conditioning on 40 just so you can wear leather boots and a fur coat you got on sale at Burlington Coat Factory (Florida residents only).

31. The corset, garter belt, and stiletto heels you buy for your wife are all in your size.

32. Every year you attend the office costume party wearing a different dress, and look good doing it.

33.  You have mastered the skill of typing on your keyboard so that you don't chip a nail.

34.  Your female co-workers asked your opinion on waxing verses plucking.

35.  You come down with a rash whenever you wear men's underwear.

36.  You are not fooled by the Louis Vuitton knockoff bags.

37.  You seem on edge because your brother in law is visiting for two weeks.

38.  Your frustrated because that Vera Wang doesn't make dresses in your size.

39. You are depressed because you were in the hospital and missed "Be All."

40.  You get upset because your wife got to wear your new dress before you did, and she is getting complimented on your good taste.

41.  You justify keeping your body hair shaved by telling your friends that you are training for a Triathlon. 

42.  You frequently change the channel to QVC between commercials.

43.  You never miss the Emmy's or the Oscar's.

44.  Your favorite movie is "The Devil Wears Prada," and your favorite television show is "Ugly Betty." 

45.  You remember mini skirts and chunky heeled shoes from the first time around.

46.  You know that "hip huggers" and "low rise" jeans are one and the same, just 30 years apart.

47.  You stare at an attractive well dressed females out of envy, rather than lust.

48.  You've used the line, "I think my wife would look nice in that dress, where did you get it?" more than once (replace wife with girlfriend or SO; dress with jewelry, shoes, perfume, or handbag).  

49.  You spend 10 minutes each day practicing walking on the balls of your feet.

50.  You go to a salon and have a stylist rather than go to a barber shop and have a barber.

51. You regularly use Dove body wash and Secret deodorant.

52.  You are seriously considering electrolysis and laser treatment as well as some minor cosmetic surgery.

53.  You get your ears pierced then tell your friends that your a big fan of "Pirates of the Caribbean" and Captain Jack Sparrow.

54.  You passed up a round of golf to spend the day with your wife shopping at three different malls.

55. You have 6 ties, but 10 silk scarves, 4 pairs of shoes, but 10 pairs of pumps, 4 suits, but 3 formal gowns.

56. You finally found the courage to asked the "Hooter's" waitress where to get a pair of orange shorts like hers.

57.  You have your own professional style nail dryer.

58.  You keep a pair of high heel in your SUV hidden just under your golf bag.

59. You consider moving to North Carolina because of the change of seasons and the opportunity to increase the size of your wardrobe.

60.  You have seen every episode of "Desperate Housewives," but have no idea of the story line.

61.  You feel validated when you see a woman wearing the identical dress, shoes, or carrying the same purse that you have.

62.  You have thought to yourself that you would look better in that outfit your female co-worker is wearing.

63. You have the recurring thought of what it would be like to have nice breasts and hips.

64.  Your single and not in a romantic relationship, but have a bathroom filled with feminine beauty products.

65.  You automatically sit down whenever you go to the bathroom.

66.  You have 1 wallet, but you also have 6 handbags.

67.  You have 1 hairdryer, but you also have a curling iron and a flatiron.

68.  Your single and the pantyhose drying in your bathroom belong to you.

69.  You know the name of the dress designer, but not the actress who is wearing the dress.

70.  You have Jamie Austin's cell phone number.


I hope that you enjoyed this page.  Now if you would like to know a little more about me then visit My Thoughts page.